Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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