Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
