come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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