Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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