Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
