How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
