I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
