But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Actions speak louder than pants.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
