smell my finger.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
