now i know why i became what i already was.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
