Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
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