then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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