like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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