just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
