we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
