The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize