Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize