my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
