we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
