remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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