I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
We just shotgunned beers for America
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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