bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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