i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
