So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Randomize
