mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
