i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
