We need to rekindle our bromance
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Your cock deserves a montage
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
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