If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Randomize
