3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
The beer is more important than you right now.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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