I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
