After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
