Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
