why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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