how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
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