I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
