Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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