love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
