quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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