Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Randomize
