I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
dude. I can hear the air.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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