Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize