I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Randomize
