Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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