I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
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