My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
