used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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