He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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