butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
