Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
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