In the future we'll all be gay
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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