You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
